Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Help Me Tom Cruise!

The summer is here and the blockbusters at the cineplex are in full force. We got pirates, superheroes, and race car drivers... your pick. "Help me Jesus! Help me Jewish God! HELP ME TOM CRUISE!" from Will Ferrel's upcoming goofball comedy "Talladega Nights," could easily be this season's most quotable line. Help me Tom Cruise... classic.

But while we are all laughing at Willy's latest shenanigans and Johnny's swashbuckling ways, there is something strangely missing from this summer's crop of movies. No, it's not the commercials that grace our presence at every show that add twenty excruciating minutes to our running time that's missing, god forbid it be that! What's missing from the theater these days? Laser pointers you ask? No, they're there. Cellphone usage during the movie? Nope, there's plenty of that too. What is missing from movies these days is the original song!

What happened?

Now, we all know it's hard out there for a pimp, but since when did it become hard out there for a song? Has the worn out montage set to "Walking On Sunshine" totally killed the original song? Let's take look at last year's Oscar nominees for best original song:

"In the Deep" from CRASH
"It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp" from HUSTLE & FLOW
"Travelin' Thru" from TRANSAMERICA

Umm, just
what the hell is that? The original song is in such dire straits that the Academy couldn't even find 5 of them to fill out the category! And seriously, does anyone even remember the songs from "Crash" or "Transamerica?" And for that matter did anyone outside of LA and New York even see "Transamerica?"

Help us Tom Cruise! Our nation turns it's lonely ears to you. (Oh yeah, hey, that was a "Graduate" reference, a movie that included original songs! Keep up with me here people.)

Please get the original song back to where it belongs. We need more "Top Gun" soundtracks, more "Footloose's," "Beverly Hills Cops's!" I'm just sayin'. I'm so desperate, I'll even take a tune penned by Dianne Warren! You want Aerosmith to sing that? Umm, ok, maybe I'm not that desperate. We need more songs that instantly relate to the flick. Think Lindsay Buckingham's "Holiday Road" from "Vacation." "I've Had the Time Of My Life" from "Dirty Dancing." Even "Lose Yourself" by Eminem. Ok, so even the Academy got that one right.

Now you've read this far (hey by the way, thanks!) and you're asking yourself "When is the whiner gonna get to the MP3's?" Well, here are a couple of tracks from movies that I to this day still love:

For your consideration:
Kristin Vigard - God Give Me Strength MP3(from the movie "Grace Of My Heart", the original version, not the Elvis Costello take)

Jimmy Buffet - I Don't Know (Spicoli's Theme) MP3 (from "Fast Times at Ridgemont High")

Team America: World Police - Montage MP3 (from Team America: World Police)

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